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Do you work out? Take your anger and frustration out on your weight lifting activity. Use it to get juiced and pumped. There's no better workout than one that is totally fueled by passion—even if it's displeasure. It's better to purge your emotions in a healthy manner than to keep them bottled up. This is the most important lesson of all.

When I really could not stand one of my coworkers—she always used to greet me in a high-pitched voice, sabotage my work, and micromanage me—I finally looked at her with compassion. I thought, "Wow, here is someone who has been doing the same job for 20 years, is outside of this work demographic, probably feels threatened by fresh minds and sharp skills, and probably feels inadequate.

That too, and she probably is trying hard to fit in. She doesn't know how to interact with me and doesn't understand me. What I started looking at her with compassion. I surrendered and accepted her faults and all. Every time she made her high-pitched voice and called my name I laughed and smiled. Everytime she sad something catty to me to rock my psyche, I used it as fuel to be even more badass.

Ohh jealousy, the green-eyed monster. It's the worst and the hardest to identify. Whenever I used to complain about how much someone would annoying me, a close friend of mine used to say, "Sometimes you don't like traits in others because you have those qualities in yourself" either suppressed or unsuppressed. Could it be? Maybe there's a woman in your work environment that you can't stand. She thinks she's all this and that. She dresses a certain way, moves a certain way, talks a certain way, and thinks she's the most important person in the world.

Maybe she even flirts and acts inappropriately in your eyes. As a moral, reserved person, you cannot stand the behavior. Here's something for thought: Maybe, just maybe, there's a part of you deep, deep inside that wants to feel feminine, free, and seductive.

Considered Response, Not Naiveté

It doesn't mean you have to act out on it because perhaps you are conservative or have beliefs against it, but. Similarly, perhaps your coworker is arrogant. He walks in and treats you like you're nothing, and he messes up at work and doesn't bat an eye.

Maybe he drives a hideous convertible and parks it in the front parking lot for everyone to see. He thinks he's the man. You, on the other hand, are reserved, smart, hard-working, and humble. Did it ever occur to you that maybe YOU don't want to give a damn about anyone, drive that ugly convertible, and walk into a place like you just don't care?

5 Ways to Work With People Who Annoy You

It's okay if the answer is "no" to all of this. I know that my jealousy over the years has surfaced from feelings of inadequacy, feeling threated, frustrated, and from having low self-esteem. Use your nemesis for inspiration. I am not kidding here! Instead of hating them, see them as a character in a movie—and use their clownish ways as inspiration for your alter ego.

How to Deal With Annoying People

Maybe one day your boss sends you an email and critiques your work. Instead of feeling bad, reframe your thinking to, "Well, I'm competent and great, I've got this. Strut your stuff and enjoy. Life is for living, remember? Our clocks keep ticking.


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  • 5 Ways to Work With People Who Annoy You?

If you are working in a toxic environment or dealing with someone who is verbally, emotionally, or mentally abusive, something aggressive needs to be done. Before you make your move, it's important that you smartly document every occurrence. I have had the unfortunate experience of working in a toxic work environment where there was constant bullying and hazing. I stuck it out for a long time thinking it was me until I watched them do it new hires.

If you are in a toxic work environment you should seriously consider reporting the behavior. I know this is scary because it could be workplace suicide. In my situation, everyone was too afraid to report the bullies. I eventually transferred to a different worksite.

3 Ways to Deal With Annoying People

I can't tell you how relieving this was. I've also seen people get successfully fired for bullying. If you do need to make a move, time it with a promotion or apply for a different position. The bullies will want to keep prying to break you. Keep your composure.

Three Mental Tricks to Deal with People Who Annoy You

In the weeks leading up to your transfer, watch your back. They will have it out for you. Keep yourself in check and just remind yourself you will be done soon. Don't take anything personally. Continue to be kind and leave them in the dust. If you have been documenting the abuse and bullying, good job. When the time is right, consider reporting the behavior to someone you trust. This act can be extremely scary, but this person needs to go.

98 thoughts on “How not to let annoying people annoy you”

I worked in a setting where people finally came together and reported the abuser. That person got fired and the workplace became peaceful. If you are in a position where you are old enough and earn enough to move out, you need to move out for self-preservation. Physical, emotional, and mental abuse are all not acceptable and even illegal. If someone is calling you names every day, this can effect your self-esteem and performance on the long-term. All living things are sensitive to energy.

Students exposed living plants to both negative and positive dialogue for 30 days straight and recorded their observations. It was found that the plants that were bullied for 30 days failed to thrive, and the plants that were spoken to kindly flourished. The same thing goes for humans—you are a product of your environment, so if you're surrounded by negative people, get out.

If things are really bad in your home environment, you or the person who is affecting you or you alone should seek out counseling. If the situation is really bad, social workers may get involved. If it is a spouse or child who is affecting you, they need counseling.

How to Deal With Annoying People.

If you dig deeply enough, I believe you can find something that any two people share in common. The key is to pick a topic that is fun for both of you to talk about, taking the focus away from the behavior or topics of conversation that have annoyed you in the past. There must be some shared interest you can bond over. As good as it feels to blame my annoyed feelings on the actions or words of someone else, it feels even better to know I have the power to control how I feel. My ultimate goal is to become so unshakable in my own joy and positivity that no one else's mood or behavior can rock my boat.

These days, my boat is still quite unstable. And accepting that is part of this ongoing practice. In all areas of life, we can make a practice to cultivate gratitude , almost as if we were exercising weaker muscles. We can learn, through this practice, how to focus more on the positive and to take responsibility for our own feelings and experiences — even the annoying ones.

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